June 06, 2018

What a time to be alive hey? We have the likes of tinder, instagram, snapchat and other apps in order to flirt, meet people and ultimately find love.

Isn't that so sad? I get 'matches' on tinder every day of my life and am unfazed by messages I receive but when a guy who goes to my gym taps me on the shoulder and asks if I want to go for a drink with him sometime, I am literally speechless/terrified/confused. 

Its such a shame that now-a-days, romance is through a phone rather than real organic conversation and meeting in person. Meeting someone in real life that you met online is kind of the normal thing now, but going for a drink with someone you see almost every day is strange!? How twisted is that??

I've been single a year, which some may say is not long at all some may say its a very long time but what I can say is that I've learnt so much from the past year. I didn't have a clue how dating worked this time last year, and its actually been very interesting to experience the dating culture in 2018 being a single 22 year old girl. I am content being alone, and life isn't all about finding love but it is one of those things that some people want. Its totally fine to be single and not want a relationship! 

So, here it is. The tough reality (in my opinion, I don't know everything!)

-  At the end of the day, whenever you start seeing someone, it's either going to end one day (sad but true) or you will end up together for the long term (maybe even marriage and kids and a divorce)That. Terrifies. Me. Maybe it's not normal to think about that at the start but it always crosses my mind. So ask yourself at the start, do you really want to get involved with this person be it short term or long term?

- Its a roller-coaster. Some days you will feel happy, wanted, excited and like everything is fine and dandy. Other days, you will want to through your phone at the wall. (I have experienced both, my phone thankfully not damaged).

- You will get rejected, deal with it. Not just for looks, but sometimes it can be other factors and people can simply just 'not feel it', and thats okay. On to the next one.... (its also TOTALLY fine to be happy single remember!)

-  Just because you've been on dates with someone, doesn't mean you are inclined to sleep with them. Always go at your own pace. It is okay to say no, and no means no.

- There are some weird people out there. Always put your own safety first! Tell people where you're going if meeting someone (regardless if you met them online or in real life!) and if you feel uncomfortable at any point block them/delete them/ LEAVE the date.

- We are not born mind readers, and that is because people are meant to TALK ABOUT HOW THEY ARE FEELING. It's so difficult trying to work out what someone is thinking and taking little signs and reading into them and getting yourself in a rut trying to work out what on earth this other person is thinking. I mean, don't over share but give some indication please.... Its unfair to leave someone completely in the dark and confused. 

- What is up with the frequency?? Is it normal to text someone once a day, 10 times a day? Long messages or short messages?  Please, don't ask me cause- I don't have a clue. All I can say is, if they aren't replying..... don't KEEP messaging. Clearly not interested. Move ON. Yep, sorry hun. He wasn't that fit anyway... How often are you meant to go on dates though? Yeah, I really don't know on this one I am clueless, sorry. 

- The saying still goes, if someone WANTS to see you, they will MAKE it happen. This works both ways, if a girl wants to see you she will ensure she is free! If a guy wants to take you out.... he will ask. Don't push it.

- You have to love yourself in order to even survive in this dating day and age. Have respect for yourself, and always put yourself first. Its tough, but have fun and embrace the good times. Someone out there is going to find you the most amazing/perfect/wonderful human specimen ever. It will come when you least expect it too, I imagine. 

So, I don't think my view is too negative?

Life is an adventure, 'love' is too I guess? Enjoy the good moments and look back and laugh at the down right weird ones. Never give up hope that there is someone out there for you! (Whether they are waiting for you down your local coffee shop, at the beach, on tinder or through a friend..... I could go on... people meet in all sorts of ways!)

What are your thoughts on dating culture in 2018?

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